Blog Post
Mourning a Man I Never Knew
This spring, I turned fifty-four. I have now outlived the father I never knew: my biological father. It’s been almost twenty-three years since we spoke; eighteen years since I learned of his death. I’m still dealing with the strange grief of his loss.
Anticipatory Grief During a Pandemic
Post by Maureen Pollard, MSW, RSW It is 2020 and the world is gripped by a relentless pandemic. The news is filled with rising numbers of confirmed cases, frightening death tolls and slowly increasing numbers of recovered patients. People are facing orders to stay at home except for essential business to help slow the spread of covid-19.
Shadowloss: loss in life
Shadowloss is a term developed by Cole Imperi, a thanatologist and the founder of The American School of Thanatology. It describes the types of loss we feel in life, rather than the loss of life. Shadowlosses are things like divorce or the end of a long-term relationship, infertility, a medical diagnosis, losing a job, or the loss of some other relationship or thing. It’s a loss that impacts the life of an individual, as well as their social network in their life.
Finding Joy During the Holidays After Loss When Everything Feels Awful: A message of hope.
My mother died in the middle of the night on January 1, four days before I turned sixteen. I don’t remember much about Christmas the couple weeks before she died, just that we spent a lot of that season in the ICU of the hospital where my mother had birthed my brother and I. For…
What Does Grief Support Look Like?
When we experience significant, on-going symptoms of grief that interfere with our adjustment to the reality of our loss, it can be time to seek professional help. It can be difficult to know where to find help and what grief support options are available.
Getting Comfortable Talking About Grief
Post by Maureen Pollard, MSW, RSW Getting Comfortable Talking About Grief There was a time when death was part of everyday life. People didn’t tend to live long, and there was often a great deal of suffering while they were alive. Birth happened in the home, and death often happened there, too. If death happened elsewhere, the…
Forgiveness at the End of a Life
Post by Maureen Pollard, MSW, RSW Forgiveness at the End of a Life One of the most difficult things about death can be the experience of unresolved conflict. When we’ve had a turbulent relationship with the person we are grieving for, it can really complicate our feelings. Forgiveness is a good goal, but it can be hard…
When You Can’t Be There As a Loved One Dies
Post by Maureen Pollard, MSW, RSW There are times when we have some warning that a loved one is dying. We can change our agendas and make travel plans in order to be present at the death or in their last days. Other times, it simply isn’t possible. If death comes swiftly and unexpectedly, we are left…
How We Learn to Cope With Grief
Post by Maureen Pollard, MSW, RSW How We Learn to Cope With Grief Death inevitably brings grief when the person who died is someone we love. Grief is never easy, even when the death is one that comes in the natural order of life; a loss we were expecting. We learn to cope with grief through experiencing…